Whether we’re single, married, divorced, have children, don’t have children, work, volunteer, take care of our parents, have health issues, lose our jobs, have to look for work, look for love, whatever it is, we seem to be having a difficult time making the adjustment to the advancement, the accessibility and the change that has come to define how we live in our world today.

The result?  Stress!  Stress at epidemic levels. Do we want to wake up in the morning and be in a life we know we can handle, enjoy and thrive?  Yes.  Do we doubt it?  Yes. How exactly can we go at this stress in our everyday lives and work to change it?

TAKE A STEP BACK. What I mean is, in order to make change, you have to really see what is going on. Look at your life and the result of some of the choices you’ve made.  Look at the relationships that mean something to you, and see the impact.  Once you see it, you have a shot at changing it.

FIND THE COURAGE TO SAY NO AND DO LESS. We have become the society of people who believe the more you do the better you are.  Challenge yourself to realize that there is little truth in this. Learn your limit and stick to it.

LIVE IN THE MOMENT. Yes, we’ve heard it a million times; you know why?  Because it’s true.  Everything you do can become an experience. Challenge yourself not to think about what it is you haven’t done, or what it is you need to do later.  Try staying where you are right now.

CHANGE THE RECORD. Whatever record you have playing in your mind about who you are in the world, what you need to do, and why you need to do it, you may want to change it.  Make sure you are listening to something from inside yourself that is supportive and positive with no judgment.  It’s a gift that costs nothing and can move your thoughts, and eventually your life, to a place in which you can wake up in the morning and want to be.

Liz Pryor is “Good Morning America’s” advice guru, a modern-day Dear Abby.  She also writes a weekly online column at ABCnews.com and her own “Dear Liz” page for advice seekers.

It seems somewhat befitting and ironic that the day before I sat down to write this piece, I went to a new massage therapist. I thought I was going to tell you, in how-to, self-help guide fashion, how I manage stress in my life. (Everyone loves tips, right?). I was going to convey that tension is best released on the bike at spin class twice a week. I was going to tell you about my weekend runs at a trail near my home, and how I take travel getaways, or go to the spa every now and then for a facial.

Well, my new massage therapist changed my mind because she found stress in places I never thought I had.

As a working journalist and television producer in a large media organization, it is easy to get caught up in the news and mentally ignore all that is hidden and not in front of you. Television producers are masterful multi-taskers and crisis management experts—in the field or in the control room. Apparently I hadn’t thought to “produce” stress relief in my own life.

I had treated myself to many massages prior to this one, and what I thought was a relaxing lunch hour trip to the spa to start my weekend, ended up being an uncomfortable experience. Coaxing knots out of one’s muscles and uncovering pain you didn’t know existed is not relaxing.

What I realized, and was graciously taught that afternoon, is that stress manifests itself in so many different ways. My body’s fight or flight mechanism has been expertly finding ways to pack the stress away so that it’s not overtly seen or felt. In my case, only expert hands were able to find my hidden stress. Now, it’s up to me to be more aware of how I produced that stress to begin with.

Career women often hold to the notion that they can be all, to all, at all times—as if we have something to prove. I certainly am one of them. I recently took a personality test that indicated one of my greatest strengths was my “achiever” quality—a desire to grow and constantly achieve and meet goals. After over a decade in my profession achieving and growing and covering some of the world’s biggest news stories, I am now turning to my own developing story: the need to produce unknotted muscles. It will be the most important self-help guide I’ll pen for myself.

As I was leaving, the therapist said, “Please come back in two weeks. I want to help you.”

Graciously accepting help: Tip #1.

Maria M. Ebrahimji is a journalist and executive editorial producer at CNN and the co-editor of “I Speak for Myself: American Women on Being Muslim” (White Cloud Press, 2011).

by Lena West

I wanted to take this time to answer a question I received from someone who would like to remain anonymous, but I think we can all identify with her, yes?
Question: I am an event promoter, but I am so overwhelmed with my social networks — it’s taking over my life. I spend more time on the computer than I do meeting clients to promote my variety of business ventures. Today I’m associated with 10 different social networking sites. What gives? I just can’t keep up this pace for much longer!

This is actually an excellent question and one that my students and my private clients ask all the time. The answer is as simple as four steps:

STEP 1:

You need flexible structure. As a smart business person, you probably wouldn’t allow any other part of your business to “take over your life,” so why should you allow social media to do that? You wouldn’t allow bookkeeping to take over your life. You wouldn’t allow email to take over your life. Don’t let social media do it either. The first step is making the decision to put social media in it’s place. That might sound silly but you understand what I mean.

STEP 2:
Start by giving yourself a schedule. Pick two or three days out of the week which you will designate as your “social media” days. I am NOT saying that you should ONLY do social media activities on those days, but rather, those are the days that you have predesignated to be full-on active with social media. This will allow you to stay visible while keeping your sanity.

STEP 3:

The next thing is figure out where your market is and be there. For example, if your potential clients aren’t on Facebook, why bother? It doesn’t mean that you should ignore Facebook altogether, it just means you don’t want to put a lot of your energy there. And, if people invite you to social networks that you’re not familiar with or that don’t resonate with you — and your market isn’t there — hit the delete key. Remember, you’re in charge here.

STEP 4:

Also, if you’re still stumped about what you should do, you might want to download our Insider’s Report, 76 Ways to Expand Your Influence, Explode Your Income and Rock the World, it will give you 76 different ideas and distinct actions to take with your social media marketing to get out of overwhelm and start getting results. The report is available free from our website at: http://www.InfluenceExpansion.com

Once you start to develop your own set of rules for managing your social media initiatives and stop allowing social media to manage you, you’ll be golden.

Lena L. West is an award-winning social media consultant, blogger, speaker, journalist, technologist and the founder of InfluenceExpansion.com, the only social media training program created exclusively for women business owners and leaders.

As a result, Jones has now committed her life to inspiring others who face life-challenging situations. She discusses real life situations we all face: learning to grow through pain, making decisions that will help us far into the future, overcoming failure and discouragement, and applying practical principles that point the way to personal and spiritual breakthrough.

Moderator: Moira Forbes, vice president and publisher, ForbesWoman and host, “Success with Moira Forbes”

Panelists:

Maria M. Ebrahimji, journalist, executive editorial producer, CNN and co-editor, I Speak for Myself

Carol Fulp, senior vice president of brand communications and corporate social responsibility at John Hancock Financial and representative, General Assembly, United Nations

Kyla Lapierre, senior vice president, State Street Corporation

Jane Swift, first woman to serve as Governor of Massachusetts, former State Senator and CEO, Middlebury Interactive Languages

• Create a concise message
• Capture and engage your audience
• Build and exude confidence in yourself and your concept
• Deliver with clarity to wow your listeners

Speaker: Lena West, CEO & founder, xynoMedia Technology and creator, The Technology Diet

Moderator: Gina Otto, award-winning author, producer, social entrepreneur and children’s advocate

Panelists: Kimberly Kissam, co-founder, Isabel Harvey

Leigh Hurst, founder, Feel Your Boobies

Barbara Lynch, James Beard award-winning chef and CEO, Barbara Lynch Gruppo

Bobbie Weiner, film industry makeup artist, business entrepreneur and author

In her keynote speech, Beck talks about how to harness fear.